Holidays and Life

Thanksgiving is supposed to be about thanking God for the many blessings He has bestowed upon us. And yes, I do thank him for that. I am especially thankful that he sent his son to die so that I might live. What an incredible gift! What mercy. But holidays are often a time of sadness for many. So many people have lost loved ones and the pain is still fresh. And holidays are a reminder of what they've lost. This is the first Thanksgiving since my cousin Marie died. Even though I didn't always see her on Thanksgiving I could always call her and cut the fool. And we'd always vow to get together soon. Yes, I am sad. I miss her like crazy. But I am also thankful that God allowed her to be in my life for as long as she was. She touched my heart in a way that no other has. She inspired me. She taught me that it's okay to laugh in spite of the pain. It's okay to live in the face of death. Marie was always so concerned with other people. She would go out of her way to make sure everyone was doing okay. Even the last week of her life she didn't want to go lay in her bed for fear of offending people. It didn't matter that she felt like crap. She wanted to be the best hostess to her guests. But you know, I've discovered that it's okay to show others that you're hurting. It's okay to say, "I need to go rest." We can't be all things to all people at all times. We're human. That being said, let me say, "I am hurting." I miss Marie. I miss my brother in law David. I miss my mother in law. I miss my husband's Uncle Joe. Too many losses in such a short time. Still, I am thankful for all that God has blessed me with. A husband who adores me, great children, some amazing grandsons to love, and a family that I love dearly....life can be bittersweet, can't it? There are joyful moments, and moments of intense grief. There are times when we suffer, and times when we comfort those who suffer.

I was sitting here thinking about how my life is right now...and you know, it could be a lot worse. I may be struggling financially, but I have food on the table and a roof over my head. I may have health issues, but there are those who suffer far worse health issues. I think about people like the Matthews Family and wonder how they can face each day, having lost two children in such a short time (http://www.thematthewsstory.com/). I think about those in other countries who lose children from things like cholera. I think about how those mothers and fathers grieve the loss. It must be a hard thing to deal with. And what about the children who lose their parents? Life isn't always fair. And sometimes I'd like to shake my fist at the sky and scream, "Why God?" But even in those moments, I know that He works all things together for good. I know that He is in control and sees the bigger picture. So then I pray, "Open my eyes, Lord that I may see as You see. And open my heart that I may respond as You would respond."